So my softball team is in the championship game this weekend. That's fun, except I'm about 90% sure I won't be playing. And one of the other teams is crying about when we beat them by one run in the last inning on a bad call by the umpire. They're saying he made the call because he's dating our coach, which he IS but ISN'T why he made the call. He had already made the same call during the game in the other team's favor and in the game the week before. So get off our freaking necks.
I had a really stellar weekend because Annoying Roommate (trust me, annoying is a COMPLETE UNDERSTATEMENT) went to Utah for a family reunion. She left Wednesday night and the rest of us wanted to PARTY. But we didn't, because we're kind of anticlimactic and boring like that. I can't even think of one thing I did that night...I'm thinking we watched TV and ate Otter Pops. It's pretty much what we do every night. But it was so glorious without her annoying comments and her annoying chewing and her general annoyingness! Thursday...yeah, we still didn't do anything fun. Friday night we had softball games to attend to, but afterward we got a pizza and rented She's All That (we wanted 10 Things I Hate About You but it was gone--curses!) and were so excited to watch a movie and eat pizza at our apartment WITHOUT Annoying Roommate and we popped the movie in and...
Our DVD player wouldn't play it. It said it exceeded the parental control settings. It's PG-13! Ugh. We've had this problem before, with Far and Away, AKA my favorite movie EVER. We don't know the password for it, either, so we just had to go to a different apartment. Wah wah. And then we hit up the park for some swinging/sliding/monkey barring action. It was fun besides the fact that we were all exhausted and falling asleep on the play equipment. And then we walked down the hall--I live at in 101 and we had to walk down the whole hallway, past 110 and 109 and so on--and every single apartment we passed was either devoid of girls or full of girls on dates with boys. We were admiring everyone's decor; lots of cutesy curtains and quotes and furniture and such. Then we (three single girls with absolutely no boys in sight) walked into our apartment and were hit with an overwhelmingly disgusting stench coming from the sink, which was overflowing with dirty dishes. The garbage was spilling over, the counters were dirty, and we all kind of looked around and looked at each other and shrugged and sighed and decided that was why were hanging out together, just the three of us, on a Friday night, instead of on dates.
But then we kind of didn't care anymore and all went to bed.
A frequent topic of discussion in our apartment is "Why don't boys like us?" We are, I assure you, VERY fun girls. We are all funny and smart and witty and (except for Annoying Roommate) not annoying. And the most repeated part of this recurring discussion is, "I mean, I'm not disfigured or anything!" We just don't really understand what girls DO to make boys chase after them! We were observing some girls at devotional one Tuesday, trying to pick up tips, but they all did the stupidest things...the eyelash-batting, hair-flipping, giggling type of things that will NEVER happen for myself or my roommate Kay Lynn. We discussed the idea of wearing foofy perfume, but rejected it because, well, we're not very girly. And I always get a headache when people wear perfume. So that's out of the question. But those girls always have boys after them! And then we decided that we didn't want the type of boys that went for those types of girls.
Unfortunately, that leaves us with...no one. Wah wah. So we've gone back to Plan A--waiting until our missionaries get home. They're better than all the stupid boys here anyway.
I finally thought of a title! It's what I yell for the whole apartment when we start the "why don't we have boys" conversation. Because we ARE. Please take the liberty of checking out how fun we are below.
4-wheeling!
Riding around in the backs of trucks in various states of sunburn!
Getting in our uniforms 2+ hours before our games and showing off our amazing muscles!Seriously. We just don't understand why we don't have any other friends besides each other...but then we realize we are too cool for anyone else anyway.
So fun to find your blog girl! After reading this post, boy do I have a chant for you and your roomies! It's called, "The Go-fer Girls." Goes something like this, "We are the Go-fer Girls. We always Go-fer guys. They never Go-fer us. We wonder why?" And then the best part, you have to stick your top front teeth over your bottom lower lip and suck 4 times (syncopated now) like a gopher. Try it, it'll make you laugh anyway! (And I'll laugh just thinking about you sitting here reading this and trying to figure out what in the world I'm talking about). Sorry I can't tell you the tune of it. I'll have to sing it for you one day. For now, you'll just have to make up your own tune.
ReplyDeleteI've got another one about finding a guy that's loaded, but I'll save that for another day =) Oh boy, sometimes I miss those college days.
The guys who like girls who bat their eyelashes and twirl their hair in their fingers are the same guys who spend 45 minutes on their hair and like to talk about how awesome they are and like to sit around soaking up their awesomeness. And I'm pretty sure it'd be better to be single than to spend an eternity having to wait your turn to look in the mirror!
ReplyDeleteAs long as you aren't smelly or dirty - and you're obviously not disfigured... well, besides the height issue (totally joking!!) - you'll find a guy just for you.
Be yourself - corny, but totally true. And when that totally hot/cool/talented young man finds you, you'll be so glad you didn't splash on perfume and up with some idiot who doesn't even understand your jokes.
Trust me... it's what I did.
How are you already a hit with the Blogging world? I try really hard to be funny and I rarely get comments. Curse you.
ReplyDelete